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Three Lions? More Like Three Weeks of World Cup Widow-Dom

It’s that time of year the world has been waiting for. Big screen TV sales are through the roof, the fridge is groaning under the weight of fifty beer cans, and you’re lucky if you can even see a glint of light through your England flag-adorned front windows.

But the majority of UK women are left wondering what all the fuss is about as they brace themselves for a colder bed while their partners spend every waking moment of their lives glued to the box.

At the risk of tarring everyone with the same brush, this won’t apply to all women. These days, more and more of the fairer sex are warming to the Beautiful Game and are more than happy to sit beside their other halves in the pub, clutching a pint and cheering for their country, not to mention the ever increasing amount of women footballers themselves nowadays.

But it’s safe to say that for the football-loathing wives and girlfriends of 2010’s World Cup, they must prepare to put themselves well and truly on the backburner for the next few weeks.

We had the Sex and the City movie, now it’s their turn. From now until mid-July, it’s futile to even attempt asking your beloved’s opinion on anything that isn’t related to a football, England or South Africa. Husbands and boyfriends are committed to one thing only- the TV.

Even standing in front of them wearing a potato sack and asking earnestly: “Do you honestly like this outfit?”, will most likely elicit the same response: “You look great, love. Now move, you’re blocking the TV.”

Let’s face it – us women can’t compete with the World Cup. But honestly, do we really want to? A recent survey by Littlewoods Bingo found that over 80 per cent of women are anticipating constant arguments with their other halves, over how much football they will be watching. In another survey, conducted by Indesit, nearly a quarter of the 4000 women questioned are privately hoping England will get knocked out of the World Cup at an early stage and one in 20 fear their relationship could break up due to all the stress caused by the games. Which begs the question – why are all these women wasting energy worrying about a game of football and not rejoicing in three weeks of glorious man-free independence?

Granted, women’s days of being chained to the kitchen sink and racing to get their husband’s egg and chips on the table for 5pm sharp, are well and truly over, but during a time when men are positively basking in their masculinity, we women should ensure we make time for ourselves in this World Cup. If you genuinely would be more interested in watching paint dry than knowing which country will eventually get their mitts on the coveted World Cup trophy, then it’s time to take advantage of your absent-minded man, and go and do something fulfilling that pleases YOU. Girly shopping trips, karaoke and cocktails -it’s true you can do all these any time, but since it IS the World Cup and you’re not going to get your man’s full attention for at least another two weeks….

Take his credit card and treat yourselves to a pair of new shoes.

Well, it is only fair…..

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